Weeknight or weekend, one surefire way to save money on a birthday party is to host it at home. Of course, entertaining a dozen or so children is not for the faint of heart. We offer five things to remember if you want to keep yourself sane and your guests happy.

• You will be outnumbered. When deciding how many guests, birthday party expert Bill Doherty suggests "the number you can comfortably handle without professional training in child group management."

Doherty, professor of family social science at the University of Minnesota, and founder of birthdayswithoutpressure.com, says you shouldn't have to invite other adults to help.

If that means limiting the invite list to five, so be it. If you feel you can handle 20, bring 'em on.

• You don't need goodie bags.

"One of the worst ideas ever invented," is how Doherty describes them, actually. These parting gifts tend to be either junk the children don't need, or expensive items that escalate into one-upmanship within the party circuit.

They also undermine the spirit of celebrating others, says Doherty. "You're giving to the birthday child; you don't need to get anything tangible to bring home," he says.

• You do need a plan.

Plan an activity to occupy guests before everyone has arrived. Paints and markers to decorate a tablecloth? A beanbag toss?

Once the full party is present, have a lineup that will occupy more than the allotted party time, in case some are duds. Figure 20-30 minutes, tops, for singing and cake.

• Children need to move.

Keep them going with sack races, treasure hunts, duck, duck, goose and other age-appropriate games.

For the preschool set, try sprinkling pennies or other smallish objects throughout the yard and sending your partygoers on a hunt. Pinatas are a hit with all ages.

• This is not an inaugural ball. You certainly want your child to feel special on his or her big day. But stretch limos and spreads that rival a wedding reception foster an entitlement complex that's unhealthy for children and unsustainable for parents.

"One mom told us her 11-year-old came back from her party at Mall of America and said, 'Next year will be the horse barn, and the year after that we'll do the indoor wave pool,"' Doherty says.

By keeping the celebrations simple and unique, you can teach your children to value friendships, find joy in simplicity and, one hopes, resist the urge to up the ante with each passing year.