Divorces fall, marriages rise in county
In the last 10 years, Butler County has seen a steady increase in marriages while divorces have taken a dive.
“I think people are maybe waiting until they’re a little bit older to get married, that seems to be something I noticed,” said Kelly Ferrari, county prothonotary. “So maybe they’re a little bit pickier.
“From my own experience, I was 20 when I got married, and my son is 32, and he’s getting married next year.”
Ferrari said there were 447 divorces filed in the county in 2011, which dropped to 376 by 2021 — a nearly 16% decrease.
A recent United States Census Bureau study comparing national divorce and marriage rates between 2011 and 2021 called divorce rates in Pennsylvania “significantly lower” than the national average.
At the county prothonotary’s office, Ferrari said she and her colleagues were surprised to find divorces did not instead rise in the county after the stress of a global pandemic.
“I think people were stuck at home and maybe if the situation was bad before then it got worse,” she said. “But I think a lot of people realized that they could really live a much simpler life — like, ‘we don’t need to go out to dinner three nights a week’ — and they found things to do together as a family.”
Ferrari said she believes the slower pace of pandemic life actually allowed couples and families to spend meaningful time together and dedicate time to problem solving.
“It was funny because, actually, one of the younger girls in my office said her and her husband were both working from home, and for awhile they weren’t working at all,” Ferrari said. “And she said they would go for a walk, take the dog for a walk, just enjoy each other’s company. You didn’t have that stress of, ‘Oh, we’re running to soccer practice,’ or worried about getting dinner ready. I think people realized that we can live a much simpler life and be happy.”
Additionally, she said increased awareness surrounding mental health likely played a major role in mitigating separation over the last 10 years.
“Mental health is a much more open conversation than it was 30 or 40 years ago,” Ferrari said. “My parents never would have talked about, ‘We’re going to a marriage counselor.’
“Now ... we have friends who will say, ‘Oh, you know, we’re going to try and talk it out with a third party, a counselor.’”
The openness surrounding mental health also has made a wealth of resources available, she added.
“I think people are more open,” Ferrari said. “The younger generation is definitely much more open to talking about things than the older generation where things were just covered up and held at home. I think that makes a big difference too.”
Meanwhile, marriages in the county have kept steady pace, according to Sarah Edwards, Butler County’s Register of Wills and Clerk of Orphans' Court.
In 2011, the county reported 861 marriage licenses issued, jumping to 963 in 2021 — a 10% increase.
This runs contrary to the Census Bureau’s study, which identifies a statewide decrease in marriages, with Pennsylvania rates being “significantly lower” than the national average.
Edwards noted, though, that the county has seen a surprising change in the type of licenses it issues since the outbreak.
“There are two types of marriage licenses issued in Pennsylvania,” she said. “There is your traditional marriage license, which requires an officiant to solemnize the marriage, and then there’s a self-uniting marriage license, which does not require an officiant — it’s just the couple and two witnesses.”
In 2020, the county issued 41 self-uniting marriage licenses, 5% of all licenses issued that year. By 2021, that number jumped to 71, roughly 10% of the licenses issued.
As of July in 2023 — halfway through the year for the office — Edwards said they already had issued 73 self-uniting licenses, 16% of the licenses issued so far.
“I can tell you, we have more of those licenses than we ever have,” she said.
Tonya Edinger, the Renfrew-based owner of Weddings of Pittsburgh, said the move toward non-traditional weddings and self-uniting licenses is a major trend in the industry.
“It’s huge,” Edinger said. “I have a lot of second-wedding people as well and when they’re doing it, they’re self-uniting. It’s getting with, say, 16 people, 20 people — their closest friends — and doing something at a park or their house or a restaurant. Keeping it very intimate.”
She said couples are increasingly forgoing the traditional norms of marriage in favor of a more personal, private experience.
Many couples also prefer to self-unite as a means of having a close friend or family member “officiate” the wedding, according to Edinger, rather than hire an impersonal officiant to do it formally.
“I think they want their family there, and maybe they have somebody in their family who prays and who knows them well and can speak to that,” Edinger said. “A lot of the time when you hire an officiant, they don’t know you, they don’t dig deep and get that (personal) information.”
While she said her business will attempt to match officiants with clients, many couples still prefer using someone close to them.
“Mostly people have been doing self-uniting just because there’s somebody already in their family who knows those (insider details),” she said. “And it makes the experience next-level.”
